A Stirring of the Heart
So, something has been stirring around that I have heard a lot of within some of my friend circles and it is truly something I feel passionately about that we are moving in the wrong direction in within society.
There is a current rising trend within stay at home moms as of late to pursue entrepreneurial ventures on the side as well traditional motherhood. Here me in this, I clearly think there is nothing wrong with that, as I myself run my own photography business. However, I think that we as women do need to make sure we are specifically called to what we are stepping into and recognize that it is indeed a job, it is indeed a sacrifice, and it does indeed take away from your family life. And if there is not a financial need for it, or a specific calling into it, then is it the right thing to be stepping into?
More than JUST a Mom
Some of my amazing friends were talking to me about how they were JUST a mom, as if they were not enough within our busy new culture being a mom. But let me tell you, it can be the most beautiful season and the most beautiful thing to JUST be a mom. You have the opportunity for one on one time with your child. You are the only one who can love like you do, you are the only one who can build them up emotionally like you can, you are the only one who can care for them and tuck them in and bounce with them and cradle them and nurse them and swaddle them and correct them just the way you do. YOU are their mothers and you are making an eternal impact, an eternal difference within the lives of your children. And that is enough mamas. Shouldn't that be enough for us?
I was recently listening to a podcast, Risen Motherhood, in which they were interviewing Ruth Chou Simons. What said has stuck with me for several weeks now. She mentioned that "just because a door is opened, just because you CAN do something, does not mean that you SHOULD." She has an amazing hand lettering company with gorgeous prints and just released a brand new book. She has 6 boys and looks like she is doing it all. But she is honest about not doing too much when her boys were younger so that she could invest the time. I would highly suggest this 20 minute interview with her to any mamas out there. It was truly so rich with good stuff! It has been mulling over and over and over again in my head. Just because we as woman CAN do something does not mean that we always should.
We Cannot Do It All My Friends
And I just see this concept being pushed on moms everywhere, that motherhood alone is not enough, that you have to be doing something on the side to be the “cool” mom, the “hip” mom. Or, it is broadcasted that stay at home entrepreneurs can do it all. And my friends, it is just not true. I am here to tell you. I LOVE what I get to do. I love the stories I get to document and the amazing families that I encounter, however, please I ask you to forgiveme if I have ever portrayed that this is the IT life. I have to make a sacrifices, for it truly is a business. There are MANY nights I am up until midnight, missing time and snuggles with my sweet husband as I edit and get all my business things in order. I cannot attend all the playdates or church functions or be all the places, because I have a business I am running, and I have to be at home a lot to work. My husband and mother-in-law watch the kids a lot for me as I shoot sessions or attend meetings. And for me, this works. I love beingable to photograph families, making extraordinary of their lives, bringing rich hope to their walls and advocating for orphans around the world. It is a part of me and bleeds out of me, and I truly think I am a better mom for it. BUT, goodness you guys it comes at a lofty price. No one person can do all the things nor should they. We can only be affective within the few things God has gifted us well in.
THE Stay at Home Mamas
So friends who are “just” stay at home mommas. Can we please change the jargon??! For goodness sakes, can we please instead say that we are THE STAY AT HOME MAMAS. Let’s form an amazing new tribe for you shall we? Can we rejoice with you and sing over you and build you up and encourage and affirm this hard task you have before you. You are being intentional with your children. You get to spend this time with them, and soak them in. And not to say you shouldn’t also have girlfriend time and enjoy girls nights out or all those things. By all means PLEASE do! You need it sisters! But also, recognize the weight of the amazing job you have placed before you. May we as mothers get off our phones, stop comparing to all the things we think we should be of those around us, and instead step into the unique calling we have right between our two feet. May we be fully present right where we are at, and be all there. Be all there with your kids mamas. (I am speaking to myself here too! ) Be all there, abide with the Lord, give your kids attention and love and I can promise you, when you look back, you won’t be upset at all, for all those things you were never a part of. Let’s get intentional, let’s get small with our focus, and let’s do exactly what we are being asked and just not look to all the things we “should” be doing in the eyes of the world.
So, whether you are a full time mama, a part time mama, a stay at home entrepreneur mama, or THE stay at home mama. Consider it a blessing. Use your influence. And THE Stay at home mamas. I see you. I know its hard. I know you don’t get the recognition you deserve and that your days are spent teaching and giving grace over and over again. It is so stinking hard. But can you be brave? Can you have the courage to step up and own your job, own your place and be crazy excited about it?! Time is one thing we will never get back. So, let’s STOP believing we need to squeeze in more things, and instead let's do the things we can in front of us well.
May we not be defined by our jobs or our thoughts of the type of mother we are, but rather in who we are in Christ. May our identities rest there and there alone. May we rock at being stay at home mothers and rock at being working moms. It is all just as significant. It is all beautiful and messy and hard. It is all work and sacrifice. So, let’s run after our specific missions well and rejoice with our sisters on all platforms. And in doing so, in joining this mission to be THE stay at home mamas, may we foster healthier families, and more loving homes filled with care and attention. Families that are chosen, desired, knit together and valued. Families that change the world start within the family members themselves.
~Rooting for you, THE stay at home mamas.
You’ve got this. You are so deeply loved my friends.